![]() I think this is unfortunate because it is stigmatizing and like all problematic behaviors, it arises as a means of coping with other difficult emotional wounds or problems." "Unfortunately, his attempt to address these problematic traits in some individuals has become part of popular culture and a way of labeling individuals as immature or as people to avoid in relationships. He came up with his list of traits in order to try to define these behaviors as a syndrome so it could be better recognized and treated," says Brandon. he was attempting to address a cluster of symptoms or behaviors that he noticed in some of the clients he worked with. Barrie’s "Peter Pan" as a means of helping a client to better understand their pattern of behavior and desire to remain at the adolescent stage of development. While Brandon caveats that he would never "diagnose" someone exhibiting these behaviors with Peter Pan Syndrome, he would utilize works such as J.M. In this way, we can think of Peter Pan Syndrome as a sort of arrested development at the adolescent stage of life." "It seems to be more about specific types of immature behaviors and the extent to which a person’s maturity level doesn’t match their age in what we might expect in an adult (e.g., being responsible, emotional maturity, being in a committed relationship, or being financially stable) or meeting certain developmental milestones (e.g., graduating from college, starting a career, getting married, or having children). "Maturity level is a factor in Peter Pan Syndrome as those who exhibit these behaviors are typically behaving in ways that we might consider someone who is an adolescent to behave," says Brandon. They are often in desperate search of a partner but have difficulty maintaining meaningful relationships, and while they are great at working a room, they lack the ability to move beyond acquaintances and connect further on a deeper level, adds Brandon.Īt the root of these behaviors is a desire to remain at the adolescent stage of development. Their behavior in relationships - both platonic and romantic - also may signal that you have a Peter Pan on your hands. ![]() These behaviors include: difficulty expressing emotions, procrastination and unclear or poorly defined life goals, and "magical thinking" around mistakes or responsibilities, blaming others for their problems and trying to escape their reality to make their problems disappear, explains Nathan Brandon, a psychologist practicing in California. These love-to-hate-them reality stars all exhibit typical behavior patterns of someone who fits the "Peter Pan" mold. "You can’t help but love him until he pisses you off." ![]() "He’s a southern guy, and when he wants he can be really charming," said Sonja Morgan. In a recent interview with Bravo TV, "Real Housewives of New York City's" Sonja Morgan, Luann de Lesseps, and Dorinda Medley shared similar sentiments about the playful charm that drew them to infamous Peter Pan, Harry Dubin - a real estate millionaire who has worked his way through the RHONY cast members who find him irresistible despite his non-committal, untrustworthy track record. ![]() These qualities have been kryptonite for many of reality TV's leading ladies. "Peter Pans have a playfulness that can be wonderful - yet works against involvement in life’s duties a boyish charm that is both captivating and irritating (due to the avoidance of adult reality)," she says. While these reality TV stars may be extreme examples: egotistical, rampant narcissists who struggle with the mere concept of commitment and avoid grown up responsibilities at all costs, Carla Marie Manly, a clinical psychologist based in California, says it's a real, fairly common dilemma - one you can easily fall for if you're not careful. Peter Pan Syndrome - when grown men avoid the personal and professional responsibilities of adulthood - isn't recognized as a psychological disorder, but it can explain a certain pattern of behavior. ![]()
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